Pride, Humility and Patience

Onсe a wealthy man was riding along in a splendid coach. It was drawn by 6 thoroughbred horses, bought in different countries. The carriage got stuck in quagmire, and hard as the coachman whipped the horses, they could not budge. 
But then came a peasant in a cart drawn by a couple of horses, and easily passed through that same quagmire. The rich man was astonished and asked the farmer: 
“What is the reason for the remarkable strength of your homely horses?”
"Your horses, though strong individually, are all of different breeds. Each considers himself the better and of nobler breeding, and tends to pull harder on his side. You lash one – the others rejoice. While my horses are simple: a mare with her foal. Just threaten to lash one and the other makes every effort to help the one that is by its side.”

Being a parent is something I've always dreamed of and wanted to be.  I ambitiously dreamed of having a whole lot of children and ended up with the three blessings He saw fit to allow me to raise.  Had I not had two at once I would only have two as I was told by doctors that the difficulty of my first pregnancy was due to the fact that I was carrying twins... they were wrong.  My second pregnancy was far worse, including pregnancy induced strokes and seizures, none of which the doctors could find a cure for despite umpteen medical tests to do so.  The only cure was giving birth to my singleton, my grand finale.

Now as the twins approach their teenage years and having chosen to have a baby in my mid thirties I find myself tired and disappointed at times as I watch friends planning graduation parties and sending their children off to college, some of them even welcoming grandchildren.  I am not young; my children are.

I was blessed with nine years of being an at home mom and continue to be stubborn in that the only jobs I accept are jobs that permit me to still be home with my children.  All I've ever wanted to be was a mom.  Despite an academic scholarship to college, entering college with college credits from exams I took in high school; medical school could have been a realistic option in my future.  I had a career when the pregnancy of the twins arrived and returned to it once they were eleven weeks old; a necessary evil since their father was at the very beginning of his career. By three I was able to be home with them each and every day, volunteer at their preschool and kindergarten classes and involve myself in the 'at home mommy' activities.

Now I am half a year away from the teenage years.  In the simplest words, it's difficult.  I have worked very hard to instill morals and values, as well as empathy and compassion in the hearts and minds of these three.  And then days like this occur.  I won't go into details (as we all have been there done that if you've raised children) but what is apparent is that we parents suffer far more from the discipline we are obligated to provide our children than they will ever understand.  We not only want to protect them from the world but protect them from becoming bad people... toughest job in the universe.

“Humility is the only true wisdom by which we prepare our minds for all the possible changes of life.”~George Arliss