"Any coward can fight a battle when he's sure of winning; but give me the man who has pluck to fight when he's sure of losing." GEORGE ELIOT

I've mentioned this before but I don't dream although IF and WHEN I do dream they're nightmares and I've had several nightmares of late.  You know me, I go research, read and ponder... Off to my trusty, dusty dream analysis kit.

I can't recall the details of this dream, none of the particulars, all I know is that I'm alone, feeling left and searching.  This nightmare isn't as upsetting as the others were; the ones that would have me bolt upright with blood curdling screams loud enough to awaken my children.  These don't have the demonic feel of the ones I had during the last six months of my marriage.  I am not scared, not terrified, I don't awaken gasping, crying and sweating.

But they are upsetting enough to awaken me.  It's hard to find the meaning of your dreams unless or until you're able to label them.  If I have this one again I will make sure to take notes before I go back to sleep or get on with my day.  

Freud wrote that dreams are "...disguised fulfillments of repressed wishes." He also described two different components of dreams: manifest content and latent content. Manifest content is made up of the actual images, thoughts and content contained within the dream, while the latent content represents the hidden psychological meaning of the dream. (borrowed from about.com)

I was awoken by this nightmare so early, 4am-ish, that when the alarm clocks went off for driver duties, I'd actually forgotten that I'd had it.  It hit me later in the afternoon when a song also randomly popped into my head.  So I thought about it, but couldn't quite remember the details - I seem to recall being in a department store but this is what I could narrow my memory down to in order to at least research the possible meaning of it.

• Leaving - To dream that someone is leaving you refers to feelings of rejection or of not being able to keep up. You are questioning your abilities. Perhaps you are not utilizing your full potential. Alternatively, the dream indicates an end to something; you are ready to let go of the past and move forward.
• Lost - To dream that someone else is lost represents some unresolved issues or feelings pertaining to the person that is lost. Consider what aspect of that person you may have lost within your own self. Perhaps you need to recapture and re-acknowledge those aspects.
• Disappear - To dream that people or objects are disappearing right before your eyes signify your anxieties and insecurities over the notion that  loved ones might disappear out of your life. You feel that you cannot depend on anyone and that you will end up alone. You need to work on your self-image and self-esteem.  Alternatively, to dream that someone is disappearing suggests that you may not have given sufficient attention to those aspects/qualities of that person within your own self. Have you lost touch with some aspect of yourself?
• Fighting  -To dream that you are in a fight indicates inner turmoil. Some aspect of yourself is in conflict with another aspect of yourself. Perhaps an unresolved or unacknowledged part is fighting for its right to be heard. It may also parallel a fight or struggle that you are going through in your waking life. You are unwilling to change your old attitudes and habits. 
• Cooking - To dream that you are cooking signifies your desire to influence others in such a way so that they will like you or become dependent on you. Alternatively, it represents your nurturing side. You want to be loved. Or the dream could mean that you need to express your creativity. To dream that you have difficulties cooking indicate that you are trying too hard. 

Now for the doozy. The song that came into my mind, that then prompted the recollection of the nightmare.  Yep folks, welcome to the mad house called my mind.

Am I losing it?  Yeah, maybe.  I'm pretty sure this was the song that was played at my sister's wedding so what the heck brought THIS to mind?  I'm pretty sure I'm psychologically screwed.  Time to get fitted for a white jacket.

{([*thud*])}


"Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane ...All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream." ~Edgar Allan Poe